may be moving this too tumblr... hrmm so long blogspot?

"You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I’m not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you’re back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing. So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day."

- the notebook

cant escape the inevitable

trying desperately to grab fistfuls of sand yet it slips through my fingers every time...

i wonder how you're feeling...

do you ever feel like a plastic bag?

didnt see that one coming...

oh boy, am i glad im outta that circle! all that drama..

built on childs play and immaturity.

maybe those old friendships may not need mending after all.

thats one lesson ive learnt, there are people you absolute adore and there are the ones that makes you vomit just thinking about them, either way remaining civil is whats best.

noughts and crosses

graduated from high school
kissed someone
smoke cigarettes
got so drunk you passed out
rode every ride at an amusement park
collected something really stupid
gone to a rock concert
helped someone
gone fishing
watched four movies in one night
gone long periods of time without sleep
lied to someone
been dumped
snorted cocaine
failed a class
smoked weed
dealt drugs
been in a car accident
been in a tornado
watched someone die
been to a funeral
burned yourself
ran a marathon
your parents got divorced
cried yourself to sleep
spent over $200 in one day
flown on a plane
cheated on someone
been cheated on
written a 10 page letter
gone skiing
been sailing
had a best friend
lost someone you loved
shoplifted something
had detention
skipped school
got in trouble for something you didnt do
stolen books from the library
gone to a different country
dropped out of school
been in a mental hospital
watched the 'harry potter' movies
had an online diary
fired a gun
gambled in a casino
been in a school play
been fired from a job
taken a lie detector test
swam with the dolphins
gone to sea world
written poetry
read more than 20 books a year
gone to europe
loved someone you couldnt have
wondered about your sexuality
used a colouring book over age 12
had surgery
had stitches
taken a taxi
overdosed
had a drug or alcohol problem
been in a fist fight
had a hamster
petted a wild animal
used a credit card
dyed your hair
got a tattoo
had something pierced
got straight A's
known someone with HIV or AIDS
taken pictures with webcam
started a fire
gotten caught having a party while your parents werent home

an epiphany thats long overdue

i just realised that all my problems would be sorted....

if i got a better paying job!

really need to get off my lazy ass and go look for one

sheesh.

lets steal the moon

finally a day at home with nothing planned, just to be able to spend all day letting my thoughts flow through to my fingertips onto the keyboard of the mac. a new year is coming, so many things have happened this year, so many things are yet to be completed and so many lifestyle changes and bad habits are to be altered. to be honest if someone had asked me what i did this year, i would probably just stare at them blankly and not know what to say. this year has gone by so fast, its only until december that we suddenly panic a little as realise that the year has gone by past us so fleetingly.

i can honestly say im going to need a complete overhaul in 2011. no more being lazy, no more being hypocritical, focus more on my goals and even though it is completely selfish, i need to sort out my own priorities and look after myself more. its time to realise that i need to fly my own plane and not let other external forces influence where i decide to land. no one is going to be there directing for me where the safest path is and there will not be blinkers on the runway as means of instructions as to how i should prepare for the future.

im not saying i havent learnt a lot this year though, and sometimes it wasnt through the easiest of ways. breakdown of friendships, doing not so well for my course, loosing track of my goals... im not complaining though, going through all of this only saves me having to make the same mistakes again down the track, where i might be older and making changes arent so easy as they are now since im still young. for next year, i need to sort out where my course is going to take me and work hard at it, graduate with the right amount of experience and land a job that i'd be content with. prepare my longterm plans of living arrangements and a suitable part time job. hopefully ill be able to mend any broken relationships for which im partly responsible for.

and last of all, thankyou for making the last (almost) 8 months such a exciting rollercoaster ride, im pretty sure you know what im talking about when i say theme park haha. its like how you've said to me before that you dont regret meeting me no matter what happens in the future... well same goes for me too. i dont think ive ever felt this way about someone like how i feel about you, you've taught me so much. regardless for whatever that was said the other night baby all the best in canberra, whatever happens happens yeah? Lets wing it!

oh and baby, love is selfish. no matter how bad you dont want it to be.

rinse and repeat

is everything going to be okay?

PTD

PTDing like crazy

:/